Heartbroken He Must Be

It is amazing to me that I do not consider myself a lazy person, although I am. "Ashley, you should go write in your journal. Ashley, you should sit down and blog. Ashley, you should keep up with your friends. Ashley, you should go for a run," enters the persistent chatter into my brain. My reply? "Nah. I'll just sit here a while. I worked so hard today, I deserve to just sit here." RED FLAG. And as if those nagging comments were not motivating enough the last one that creeps in, "Ashley, come meet with me." I may think to myself, "Who is that? God? Yeah, okay. I'll come talk to you in a couple hours. Don't worry about it. I'll be there." RED FLAG. I never show up.

Just a thought:
What must it feel like to be God? Certainly a question I do not intend on answering, just pondering. If some person in my life told me every day, "Yeah, I'll meet you in an hour," and never showed up, I might be forgiving at first. The next time it happened I might become concerned, but my concern would quickly turn to anger after the 5th or 6th time (and if I'm honest probably after the 2nd or 3rd).

My laziness has crept into my life with baby steps and over taken me with the leap of a giant. I keep longing for my body to long for work, my mind to seek reflection, and my soul to be aroused, but nothing is moving. Everything remains stagnant, flirting with the path that leads towards entropy.

I must constantly be reminded that although God calls us to a life of faith and belief, he also calls us to a life of action. My heart can be set ablaze by the Holy Spirit, but my life will not change without obedient action. I have to physically walk out the door. I have to actually get off the couch. I have to open a book and pick up a pen. I have to ask myself tough questions. I have to answer to the King. There is such a delicate balance between resting in grace and carrying out action with obedience. No one said this was going to be easy.